Pronoun Etiquette

What are Pronouns?

A pronoun is a word that refers to either the people talking (like I or you) or someone or something that is being talked about (like she, it, them, and this). Gender pronouns (like he and hers) specifically refer to people that you are talking about.

Pronouns are used in everyday speech and writing. We often assume pronouns about other people based on their clothing, voice, body type, hair style, mannerisms, and other characteristics. These assumptions are sometimes inaccurate and harmful. In Pacific University's effort to be inclusive and affirming for LGBTQ+ students, staff, and faculty, we ask that staff and faculty share pronouns (when appropriate) and respect chosen pronouns. 

There are some fears that asking pronouns will “out” students, and while that is a valid concern, trans and non-binary students overwhelmingly prefer that professors and staff ask pronouns rather than assume or ignore the topic. If students do not feel safe using their chosen pronouns in certain circumstances, they should never feel pressured to.

Gender Pronouns

People may choose to use a variety of pronouns. Below is a list of some commonly used pronouns and how they are used.

This is not an exhaustive list. It is good practice to ask which pronouns a person uses.

For more descriptions and examples, please watch What are Pronouns? 

Why is it important for Pacific University faculty, staff, and students to respect gender pronouns?

• Pacific University’s non-discrimination policy includes protections for sex and gender identities.
• The Office of Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion’s mission is to “dismantle oppressive practices and shine light on overt and covert inequities.” Sharing pronouns is an important tool in creating an equitable campus for gender diverse students. 
• Asking Pacific community members what their gender pronouns are and consistently using them correctly is one of the most basic ways to show your respect for their gender identity. 
• Discussing and correctly using gender pronouns sets a tone of allyship. It can help gender diverse students/staff/faculty feel welcomed, seen, and respected which increases recruitment and retention to the university. 
• You can't always know what someone's gender pronoun is by looking at them. When someone is referred to with the wrong pronoun, it can make them feel disrespected, invalidated, dismissed, alienated, or hurt.

How can I incorporate gender pronouns into my work?

Incorporate gender pronouns in everyday use, with these strategies:

• Edit your email signature to include your pronouns
• Verbal introductions and check-ins are great opportunities to solicit gender pronouns. As names and pronouns can change over time, it is preferable to regularly incorporate these questions into meetings and introductions. Asking about a person's pronouns may initially feel awkward or uncomfortable, but it is preferable to making hurtful assumptions and using the wrong pronoun. Here are some ways you can do this:
  • "What pronouns do you use?"
  • "How would you like to be addressed?"
  • "Can you remind me which pronouns you like for yourself?"
  • "My name is V and my pronouns are she/her. What about you?"
• Wear a pronoun sticker on your badge. You can get free pronoun stickers at the CGE - Pacific Hall 127
• Sign the CGE Coming Out Day list with your pronouns (allies welcome!)
• Have your students fill out a “getting to know you” questionnaire with their chosen name (might be different from the one legally listed), their pronouns, and other information that might be useful during their time in your classroom or department.
• When introducing yourself at the beginning of a meeting or class session, state your name and pronouns. At minimum this lets LGBTQ+ students, staff, and faculty know you are a safe person.  Often people will follow your lead and also share their pronouns as they introduce themselves.

Adding pronouns in your email signature is a best practice for creating LGBTQ+ inclusive environments. Including pronouns lets LGBTQ+ students know you are a safe resource and it can also reduce misgendering. Below you will find some samples that you may incorporate in your email signature:

Example 1:

V Martin, M.A.
Pronouns: she/her/hers
Director, The Center for Gender Equity
Office of Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion
Pacific University
2043 College Way
Forest Grove, OR 97116    

Example 2:

V Martin, M.A. (she/her)
Director, The Center for Gender Equity
Office of Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion
Pacific University
2043 College Way
Forest Grove, OR 97116    

Example 3:

V Martin, M.A. 
Director, The Center for Gender Equity
Office of Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion
Pacific University
2043 College Way
Forest Grove, OR 97116
Pronouns: she/her/hers

Example 4:

V Martin, M.A. (she/her)
Director, The Center for Gender Equity
Office of Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion
Pacific University
2043 College Way
Forest Grove, OR 97116
Pronouns I use: she/her/hers

We know that adjusting to pronouns that aren’t widely used can be hard at first. We appreciate your attention to this topic, even if it is initially challenging. Please be sure to reach out to The Center for Gender Equity if you have questions, concerns, or just want to practice using pronouns!